Sunday 22/10/2023

From the staircase house and far into the distance, where God’s mercy precedes over the mercy of people, I feel let down. I feel like I’ve caught a cold. As usual, I don’t like medicting, the cold comes and it leaves, a self healing, uninterrupted because I trust my ability to heal and I don’t trust their integrity with making medicine. To stay healthy, I believe we don’t need foreign compounds entering our bodies. To protect yourself from feeling let down, you have to surround yourself with good soil (dust)

My throat is dry, the lemon tree behind the house offered me a lemon so that I can feel less gray. I feel like I’m in a relationship with a woman who doesn’t know what she wants. One time she wants to be friends and the other, she wants to be lovers and the more time passes, the more stuck in the middle we become and the holes in the heart inflame it. It’s been 16 days and I feel gray. I’m not somewhere safe and I’m not dead.